B+ Blog

B+ Blogs are the shared body positive experiences of curvy and plus sized women around the globe. If you want to be featured as a contributor, please submit your recent articles to jai.is.alright@gmail.com.

 

"NEW YEAR...NEW THEORY"

By  Tiffany Jordan  /  January 15, 2020

 

Food has always been a vice for me and it has loved me when no one else did. 

       
So I went to it for the "comfort" and release I could get from it because it seemed to love me back. But in the love it gave me, it also gave me unwanted pounds, and so, I gained weight. Between the actual weight and the weight fluid I ballooned, thus beginning my weight fluctuating up and down. I have gained and loss, gained and loss, so many times I've lost count. 
         
During these times I realized my body was a security shield for me. My weight protected me cause I was so scared to get hurt. So I was glad I was big because it gave me an excuse to hide.
         
Most of my pain I felt I hid because I felt that no one cared, so I ate food to cover up things and let the weight build up because it was so good to me lol!  The pizza was my man! The cake was my man who would never leave me, so I ate...a lot! I was small like I am now for years (left pic), then I would drop off and the weight would slowly come back on because this lady loves bread, cheese and butter, ok! And juices...can't forget the juices lol! I got bigger and it got so bad my body started to hurt. But see, as much as I loved food, I slowly began to realize that food doesn’t like my body! It had to go cause I didn’t like my body; it was awful looking at myself so much I would cry. I knew something had to change two years ago because it hurt to move; it hurt to walk just to the bathroom. Like I said,  I would take the weight off quick and put it back on quicker. 
           
And therefore I knew I had to workout to keep it off because I do gain quickly. 
           
So over a year ago I found a place that took fitness to another level and their methods of working out has changed my body. This place lifts you up and pushes you into greatness in fitness and it makes you better all over, inside and out. "Orange Theory literally changed my body and my mind. I don’t eat much meat anymore and I only eat junk food every now and then. Food tastes different to me and my stomach has shrunken so small that I kinda eat a like bird.
             
I love what my body has done (and is doing...See right pic) and I'm glad I took the weight off because this is what works best for me. What people don't know is that once you hit the ideal weight for your body, even on the days you don’t workout, your body still burns calories. 
           
It has taken two years but it was so worth it to get my body where it is. This is not a call to be thin or to just lose weight for vanity's sake. (That's why I didn't include a pic of me at my heaviest because that's not the point. In my "before pic" on the left, I may appear to be "healthy", but my mind sure was not.) This isn't me telling anyone to lose weight at all.  This is my personal journey of what works best for me and my life! And, my body.

 

Comments: 0

 

 

 

 

 

"WHEN I LOSE THE WEIGHT"

By  Marisa Kaye  /  November 6, 2019

 

This article was originally featured on vocal.media/authors/marisa-kaye.

 

“When I lose the weight, then I’ll take a cute Instagram picture.” “When I lose the weight, I’ll get this dress.” “When I lose the weight, then I’ll make a blog page and take pictures to promote it.” “When I lose the weight, then I’ll go talk to that cute guy I see all the time” “When I lose the weight...” 

 

I think you get the picture. 

 

For most of my life, this was the conversation that I had with myself when deciding on life decisions, talking about my accomplishments, or choosing a reason not to go for something or someone.

 

I have been relatively successful in my life (not to brag or anything... but I guess if I don’t talk myself up...who tf will?). Instead of focusing on my accomplishments, such as graduating from college, moving to multiple cities to teach, and receiving a promotion at work, I think of all the things and areas in my life that I am “lacking." I’m single, and most of my family/friends are dating someone seriously, or in the works to get married. I’m also considered “overweight," and have been ashamed to actually admit that. Since I focus most of time and energy on the fact that I am single and overweight, I don’t see the positives in my life and focus on the areas that I deem as “lacking.” I continue to put things I want to do to the side, because in my head the conversations I have is, “I’ll be happier when I lose weight.” “I’ll get a boyfriend when I lose the weight.” “I’ll be more confident to take more pictures when I lose the weight.” It was always a conversation I had in my mind, but never actually admitted it or really sat down with myself long enough to understand the reasons behind it.

 

Prior to starting this blog (and the “in the works” podcast), I’ve thought about this idea of how to get my voice out there and have important conversations. I thought maybe I wanted to become a counselor, since I’ve had such an amazing experience with mine. I’ve actually been talking about starting this blog for almost six months before just starting it.

 

Self-awareness, self-acceptance, self-love, and learning more about myself are seriously my passions. I love to write, I love talking with new people, and I love getting my story out in my own expressive way. I’m really proud of myself. I’ve pulled myself out of toxic friendships and relationships, put myself in therapy when I knew I needed help, and started finding much healthier ways to express myself. When I thought about what was holding me back from actually sitting down and starting this blog, my thought was “I’d have to post pictures of myself on social media regularly to promote it... and I don’t like looking at pictures of myself. I will start this when I lose the weight.” I heard it, recognized myself thinking that, and kind of had a mental break down in my little apartment. I realized that most of my life, I’ve had this excuse not to do things I want to do because of how I perceive I look, and that my weight had nothing at all to do with starting this project. I started questioning the amount of things I had put to the side or the men I didn’t go talk to because I deemed myself fat—and in my head, fat=bad and unworthy. That night I wrote my first blog post: “The Perfect Body.”

 

I didn’t post it quite yet but even just having a “URL” page with a piece of my work on it was amazing. I was so proud of myself. For the first time in a really long time, I was proud of myself for finally putting myself out there. From there, I gained more and more confidence in my words, skills, and posts. I then wanted to start putting a face to the blog, and I started to promote my blog on social media. The only reason I never wanted to was: I hate taking pictures of myself and looking at my stomach in any capacity. That’s when I knew this was the next “hurdle” in my healing process and body confidence issues that I need to face. I’ve been posting for a few weeks now, and I’m still working on posting for myself, not others, and not worrying about likes or follows. But it gets easier when I keep writing, keep sharing my story, and keep it real with people.

Comments: 0